yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
