She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
