If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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