Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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