She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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