I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize