its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Randomize
