IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
