I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize