I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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