She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
