party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
We have started to decorate penises.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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