return my video game
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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