you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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