what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize