Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
He better not be in your backpack
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
