You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
