I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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