I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
