if i died would you start the facebook group?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
She even gives head with a lisp.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
