I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I think a kid would responsible me up
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
