is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
