Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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