Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
