bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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