He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Dicks are not precious.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
