I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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