Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
