Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
