The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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