dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
