she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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