I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Randomize
