we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
