And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
