dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize