I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
