Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
