Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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