I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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