cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
