so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
