She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
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