I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
