I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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