you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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