no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
