I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
