Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
