Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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