forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
