I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
